Not the Baha'i Faith

So, I think I want to switch religions. I mean, if I decay after I die, and there's nothing left of me, then I might as well do something different. What good will it be if I just stop existing? I'd find it much more reassuring to end up in Hell, but know that I at least have an after-life.

So what will it be? Jewish: become good in business, be under the constant threat of ridicule and extermination, have close relations with lawyers and film producers. Or perhaps Muslim: be able to bomb people and places without worrying about becoming a villain (a hero rather), be in control of the women, can threaten and 'bully' anyone of another religion, especially Jews and Hindus. Finally, I could take the step to become some distant relative of a Christian, like a Jehovah witness, or another sect (you know, just to piss those catholics off), or even an oriental religion, like Buddhism or Confucianism.

I really don't know guys, any suggestions? (Anything but the Baha'i Faith... eurreurhhhu...[shrug]).

I'm done

Coke ca Cola

Yogurt and shit

Ahem.

I'll start off by saying that I realized something today. It goes like this:

So, you're walking down the road one day whilst walking your dog. You notice that your dog always stops to mark him or hers territory. Well, what you realize is that every time your dog stops to piss, its at an abnormally green and uncalled for patch.

Yes, my friends, the green spots on grass are 100% thanks to one dog's piss or shit - it has nothing to do with your dandelion pesticide.

Another thing I will mention is that I have began to like apple juice. I've become a monster. Before, I didn't like any juice, yogurts, mustard, tofu, or other crap. But now... Oh, brethren! I enjoy the taste of all the foods, and now even apple juice (shiver). Please don't tell me I'll be eating red pepper and cottage cheese in the future. PLEASE save me from the pepper, people, please!

Anywho, that would be all for tonight. (wink).

Sincerely,

Bloodtooth.

Do you know who I hate.

Nobody.

Alex Madore.

That was a horrible bus ride with him. He doesn't understand half of the things he tries to prove.

Everything is natural - well, except for abortion.

He crapped up my already bummer mood. With my two pessimistic and and life-sucks friends, Iam completely lost.

Warning: because Madore has annoyed me with his secular humanist crap, I might be a bit religious in the few next days.

I do have some hope for after my death. (it's not willful blindness).

There. Suckiness sucks, and so do all of you!

SUCK MY... bye

PS.

HOLY FUCK MORPHINE COSTS A LOT.

at torn city.

I Always Forget Titles -_-

This day was anal.

It began with a test, and ended with a test of my patience. However, now that careers totally messed up my life plan, I am more glad than ever to enjoy a capitalist life. I'm becoming a lawyer, you see. With my high salary, I will get to enjoy the luxuries of life, like happiness. I also don't know if I exist, so that's always great. It's patheticness - patheticity. Which sounds correcter... er... more correct. (See Sarah, I, too, do use ellipses).

I have no time for this (I do). Well, buy...

Llama und Fronk, 6:22 pm.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

The Feast of the Cafeteria

And on the third day, there was a feast in the cafeteria. And it came to be that only II people had showed up. For on that day, there happened to pass another event, the comedy of errors. And when the feast had begun, Mary said unto Jesus, "wherefore has no one come?". And when Jesus heard this, he was saddened, for he had not realized this before.

And when Mary asked of Jesus, "would you like my salami?", He was greatly satisfied, and said unto the woman, "fill this salami-container with salami", and she did so. And when at the feast Jesus did taste of the salami from the container, it had become seasoned with spices. And Mary knew not whence it had come. But the cooks did know, and they applauded loudly in the kitchen. And when Mary had realized Jesus has eaten a spicy piece of salami, and survived, she said unto the Lord, "how the hell did You do that?". And then inquired of the Lord, "do you drive monster trucks", for she was astounded with His power.

And when Mark, Jesus' disciple, had come to the feast of the Cafeteria, he greatly admired Mary's curiosity. And so Mark brought Mary a leper whom she could feed, and Mary gave the remaining salami to the leper. Then he inquired of her, "why dost thy have a writing on your hand?", and Mary became ashamed, for Mary knew than no pagan or gypsy spell could make her as immune to the salami that was spicy. And so when Mark had taken the lepers away, Jesus had attempted to feed the last one with a granola product, but it was too late, for Mark was gone.

And when the feast had come to pass, both Jesus and Mary knew it was worth it, for they knew that all that was good was with them forever, and always in their minds. And after thinking to each other, both Mary and Jesus went to talk in tongues to the randomest of people, and the pentacost was upon them. And there, both Jesus and Mary warned man of the final testament, and the apocalypse. And then, in respect to God, they cleaned their souls and decorated them with ornaments of love. The art of time was upon them , and they knew the end was near. And so it was, when their last judgement had come to them in a form of a culminating task. For this was purgatory. And Jesus said " do not sin, for the devil will interview you", and then the night befell upon them.

Philippians, Book 4, Verse 14, period 2-3.

(this demonstrates how easily the bible may have been twisted - sorry, interpreted.)